Elga tossed her hair in the mirror and looked at her red evening-dress. It still frightened her sometimes, how she was alone in a hotel room, far away from home. She found herself missing her mother – how far she had flown, beyond her mother's soft lap!
Elga wistfully moved her thoughts away from her mother's gentle yet firm touch, and settled her mind on the little plushie that she had bought from this country's National Oceanarium: a penguin. Snuggled next to the moon-white pillow in her room, it'd be her companion for the remaining five days.
Looking at herself one last time in the mirror, she took a deep breath, and strode into the bar, where a waitress in red lipstick and power blazer stood to attention. “Table for one, please. I'm fine by the bar.”
Mamood tossed restlessly on the wooden floor. This abandoned shophouse lay next to a busy road, and the chatter of motorbikes, and blares of overloaded trucks, ate into his thoughts whenever he tried to focus his mind.
It was no good. He couldn't think properly, at this rate.
I told my sister-in-Christ that I was reading up on the Balkan conflict and various historical tragedies. Then she said, “why do you need to read that? the Bible already has war and violence.”
So, I will now direct my attention to visual depictions of Biblical violence.
The somewhat provocative title of this post is a nod to Simone de Beauvoir's famous book, “The Second Sex”, where sex is a somewhat quaint word for gender.
As an aside, a quote that has stuck with me from that book is: “a woman finds her value in her reflection in a man's eyes.”
And: “a young girl is taught from toddler-age that she has to behave in a feminine way. She must not open her legs wide; she must make sure her skirt does not reveal her panties while she is playing with other four-year-old children... These norms are imposed by a congregation of much older women, who confine her with a multitude of rules that delineate feminine behaviour and un-feminine behaviour.”
Okay, back to my post.
If the second sex is female, and the first sex is male, what is the third sex? I submit that the Third Sex is the male that crumbles apart in a family context, when he navigates married life with a spouse. Suddenly he finds that his own boyhood has not prepared him to handle the storms in “adult” life. All his life he has whined about – and resented – his domineering father, and now, suddenly, he himself has a mewing infant in his arms.
about the intersection between Intellectual Property (IP) laws, and creative practitioners.
I heard that design patents are only enforce-able in Singapore, if they are registered in Singapore. That means that a “pirate” in, say, China, can reproduce and mass-manufacture your designs without penalty, as long they operate within China (and possibly export to the world).
From 8th August 2024 to the present day, I have been frequenting a Fourth Space.
And what is a Fourth Space, one may ask. If a Third Space is a physical location that is neither one's home nor office – think: Starbucks – then a Fourth Space is a Third Space with the co-existence of the Internet sphere. Think about conference venues with a live-stream where remote viewers can participate in the Question-and-Answer segment of a discussion panel. [footnote 1].
What I have learnt
I refer to a book by Brené Brown, titled: “Braving the Wilderness:
The Quest for True Belonging and the Courage to Stand Alone”.
That particular Fourth Space was – has been, and still is, and quite likely will be – a frightening wilderness. After almost a year, I have nearly forgotten how intimidating it was for me, to first open the door. Hence I think newcomers to the space will probably still feel that fright today. (Hence the importance of a welcoming host, behind the door.)
One year later, I can say to myself: you're doing fine by yourself in the wilderness. Congrats, you did it all alone. (With the help of your spiritual disciplines, of course.) And other people have appeared in the wilderness, and they are doing fine by themselves too. It's solitude meeting solitude.
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.”
– Gospel of Matthew, chapter 5, verse 9
It is interesting how the Buddha has calmed down the warriors of two separate clans, who were on the verge of a war. (the story is there.)
I didn't set out to be a mediator. But, lest readers think more of me than my low estate, I shall keep the details of certain shenanigans to myself. Suffice to say that both professional workplaces and domestic abodes have seen their share of strife, whether overt or covert.
I have been working hard to find a peace-of-mind, which is so sought-after and yet so elusive. (Not even Prime Ministers and business-owners may find this peace-of-mind, though they may certainly boast of more gold bullions and nuclear bombs than me.)
